In life it seems we are always telling ourselves if we knew then what we knew now, we would have done things differently. Wow, that's a tongue twister of a sentence! In all seriousness... with Autumn close to 10 weeks I think back to when we brought her home. Even more so, when she was born. If I could go back 10 weeks I would like to tell myself ...
...Labor is tough but eventually it ends and won't be forgotten. Labor makes you strong, incredible and like a super hero. You'll feel amazing, like you've moved the world and your husband will see you completely different after. He will love you more than he thought possible.
...That back that hurt throughout the majority of the 2nd and 3rd trimester, you know. The back that didn't allow you to sleep or sit comfortably anywhere. The back that you thought would break during pushing the baby out. That back was actually just preparing you, strengthening you and once that baby is born you'll have a Back Bone! You won't be afraid to speak your mind anymore as your baby is number one. Your Back Bone will make you truly see that super hero that was created the first moment you heard Autumn cry.
...Breastfeeding will be hard, it's a journey. You will experience mastitis, an infection, Autumn will have tongue tie and you'll cringe anytime she wants to nurse. You will want to give up and you'll come to a point you do give up. That will only last a short time. The tongue tie will be fixed, the infection and mastitis will go away with great antibiotics. The down time when you are pumping and barely breastfeeding while you heal, you are going to miss breastfeeding. You will feel like you've lost your bond with Autumn, but you haven't. Even if you don't continue to nurse you'll never lose that bond. I just want you to know not to give up and to know you'll get through it, because after all.. you are a super hero.
...The nights will be tough. Even though you hadn't slept through the night during the last 8 weeks of your pregnancy, nights will be tough. They won't last long at all. When Autumn starts to smile, you'll wake up every morning and see a smiling baby. Once you see that smile it will make all those weeks prior with lack of sleep worth while. If you knew then what I know now, you'll appreciate every sleepless night that much more.
...The struggle of getting the baby to sleep. The first week will seem like a piece of cake, really. Autumn will sleep what feels like the entire day and when she nurses she will be half asleep during it. When you put her in the crib, she'll just close her eyes and bam.. asleep! You'll think "this is so easy". Then week two will sneak up on you and it will take longer for Autumn to sleep. It will seem like forever standing in front of her crib with the lights low, swaddled and rocking her from side to side. Your arms will feel sore and legs will be tired. You'll put her down and she'll fuss each time she touches the mattress. I want to tell you to turn all the lights off in her room. She likes the dark. I want to tell you she likes music at night and feels safe. She will fight being swaddled but will feel very secure in it. I want to tell you not to rock her until she's fully asleep, just with her eyes barely opened. As the weeks pass by she will begin to soother herself to sleep and you'll be patting yourself on the back saying "this is so easy".
...Your life has changed forever. You will experience a new relationship. There was a piece missing in your life that you never knew before. When you hold Autumn for the first time, you'll realize that you are complete.
